For Archie’s first birthday I decided to ask all my family to write Archie a letter to open when he turns 18. They could write anything inside, advice, a story or put a picture inside. I also asked them to seal the letter so Archie and only Archie would know what was inside the letter.
A life changing event sparked the idea. Just before Christmas I found out my Nans cancer was terminal. I was lost for words and couldn’t process it. I’m very close to my Nan and always thought she would see Archie grow up, that she would be there every step of the way. That on the days Archie is ill and off school he would be at his great nannies for chicken soup and a sneaky caramac bar. That he would have the light hearted scold off her when caught picking flowers out her garden. That he would listen to her stories of family during their childhood. But he won’t have any of that. Its something I will never get my head round, that someone in their 60s can suddenly be told they have weeks to live. As I write this I want to cry over the thought.
Nothing more upsets me than the fact Archie won’t remember her, all he will have is photographs of their time together. This is why I wanted her to write a letter for him so he would have that little bit more of her. It will be her own thoughts and words. My granddad died when I was small and I don’t remember him, all there is left is photographs and the words of others but that’s it.
It then dawned on me you truly don’t know who will still be around in the years to come, so I asked everyone else to write a letter incase they aren't around. I thought 18 would be the right age to address the letters as he would be old enough to appreciate them.
I won’t go into detail of everything I wrote in my letter for Archie as this blog post would turn into an essay.
I first wrote why I asked everyone to write the letters so he understands what value they have to him in the future but also to me as I hope he will appreciate them and not find it cringey. This is one of my biggest worries is that he won’t appreciate them as what 18 year old boy wants to receive letters for his birthday.
I then spoke about how much I love him and how he was one of the best things to happen to me. It’s truly impossible to put into words the love of a mother for their child. This was one of the hardest parts for me to write.
I then wrote about my hopes and dreams for him.
It was only simple things such as I hope he’s kind to everyone. That if he sees someone alone to say hello, most of this was based on my past experience growing up. I really don’t like to think of the past but I had people throw unkind words my way, had times where I was left out, alone and friendless. It truly is the worst and I would never wish this upon anyone.
I also wished that he would put his all into whatever he does, whether it was university, a job, apprenticeship etc. I would be happy whatever he did as long as he put 110% into it.
I wrote a few other things and then placed a photograph of us in together.
I then ordered a hand painted personalised box to place the letters in. This box was from @craftitshop
* Image belongs to @craftitshop*
I would 100% recommended writing a letter to your child to open when they are older, as depressing as it sounds you don’t know if you will be there in the years to come. At least with the letter Archie will have a little piece of me which is more than a photograph.
